Friday, January 4, 2008

Troubled Tagruato

Tagruato's corporate website has issued six press releases since we last dared wade through their hallucinogenic propaganda.

It begins with Tagruato apparently feeling the environmental heat, and responding with "generous donations" to a faux Japanese conservation society in return for a "Green Award". This is followed by a report on the grand opening of yet another ParafFun wax museum ('cause wax museums are the futura doncha know). Then comes the Tagruato company picnic, where employees line up like drug addicts for their Slusho? fix. They even admit that Slusho?'s addictive effects are responsible for the high turnout. But no Tagruato propaganda push would be complete without an appearance from the notorious Smilers! In this engagement, the Smilers administer a Slusho? overdose to an unsuspecting group of fish processors and happily watch their poison turn a group of hard working sober men into a gaggle of halfwits.

On a more ominous note, Tagruato's propaganda blitz ends with a curious report about using their "Hatsui" satellite to try and track and locate a fragment from another satellite that fell to earth. Were we born yesterday, this might not tickle our spidey senses, but we weren't born yesterday and so know full well that satellite fragments fall to earth on a regular basis, and no one bothers to track them, much less find them, since if they don't burn up on entry into the atmosphere (which the vast majority do), the pieces that do reach the earths surface are, at best, junk. So why is Tagruato interested in this satellite fragment that is apparently large enough to survive reentry? What's that really about? Something tells us there's more to this story.

Finally, Tagruato's Chaui Station is apparently the site of an industrial accident. Details are nonexistent, but Tagruato is quick to try and shift blame to those shadowy environmentalists by groundlessly insinuating "an eco-terror cell" is responsible. But while Tagruato spins the absurd, we are left to guess at what kind of environmental disaster is unfolding in the heart of the Atlantic.


Jasconius said...

So, it's begin. The workers have finally discovered what Tagruato are planning. If only they'd tell us - then again, Tidowave seem to suggest they're in no position to.

I believe the time is coming for action, not words. Tagruato no longer appears to be playing by the rules.